"If You Ask Me, I'm Ready."

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What's the boy on?

Alright, well, I bombed every song I was to do at The Comet on Thursday...that was 3 songs. A verse that seemed to come back to me when I heard the original beat yesterday...I stumbled upon 200+ beats I made in the 2007-2009 period...and two songs from the M.I.C days. I was HIGHLY ashamed......you win some, you lose some, but NEVER throw the fight....so I've been reacquainting myself with songs I SHOULD know. That's going well. I like that shit.

Later that same night, 6 niggas went home with three womens. One I had sex with(not that night), and STILL regret somewhat, the other two, I wouldn't mind hittin' 'em with the flex....hahaha, I gotta laugh at that......but we had a small freestyle session, Skeem on the table-top-pencil-beats. I murdered it, the chickens like my word play...and I like that shit. I drank Moscato, and smoked hashish...both good experiences.

......past that.

I did a beat for M.O for his Maurice Album......I'm feeling where it's going. Ace Boogie has produced all the tracks on it thus far, until I did a beat that's a monster for the album. I'm feeling the maturation of young M.O, I'm no longer annoyed by his presence, I feel he's finally growing into what we wanted him to be....that's good....I like that shit.

Shaun Fauste has gained the respect of his fellow label mates, long time coming too. Very Jay-Zeezy nowadays. I'm proud to have produced much of the EP. He talked with the manager of Buggs the Rocka(spelling?), he feels Fauste, he feels Boogie's beats, he feels my beats and rapping. We're on the way.

I'm increasing my network. People out the woodwork are feeling my musics, and women keep saying the songs "turn 'em on". YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's why I do this......okay, not really, but it's a very nice perk.

I'm feeling like I haven't done enough passing the half way mark of the year by two months. 104 songs in, more on the way, I feel I'm not doing enough to get us out. M.O is leaving for L.A in a few months, and Boogie and Skeem are plotting to go to the 'Bus....leaving me here with Fauste and Average Joe. Fauste wants to leave too...Joe is thinking L.A as well........A lot of people are suggesting New York to me....and I'm beginning to think it over.....getting there is gonna be cake, I got that covered.....but getting established, blending in, getting a name, that's the hard part.

I've been talking big boy shit, like, I'm ready to leave this city, but as I think about how big NYC is, it becomes......scary. I don't wanna leave without a sure fire idea of what I wanna do, more confidence in my artistic-ness, and money.

Other than that, I think my spittin' spree has finally ended. I've been rapping everyday just about since late April...when I was happy, eyes bright and looking forward to the future...then that got smashed with a mallet, and I'm left with broken pieces of what could've been. I'm sitting on a done Wettening 2, a rough Les Miserables, and two fragments of Wettening 3 and 4. Two songs for 20-X that I may not even use......all this shit, I just wish the world could hear it.

Pffffft. Got a lot of jockers on me. The attention is nice, but you know me, if it's not the full fledged thing, it bores me.....but the attention REALLY isn't that bad. I'm looked at like some kind of enigma, this sex in the flesh kinda thing...I dunno, it's weird to me.

Ummmmmmm...I'll end it with what I'm addicted to right now.

--midas does it for you...because if he didn't, he'd die--

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